Regrets

The word regret brings to mind longing for something that should have been done when one had the chance to do it. It makes us wish that we had a time machine to go back into time and change what we did. It makes us sad and remorseful about not doing whatever that thing was – a trip out with friends, not taking up an internship, not joining the company of own choice etc. No matter how much we grow up or how much ever we mature but we always continue having regrets about a number of things. And somehow they grow as we grow up when our life doesn’t turn the way we wanted or expected. We long to go back to that point, where we could have done chosen the other option and then wonder how our life would be then. I don’t think it is bad to have regrets or that there something to be resentful about.

Regrets are a very important part of life. They teach us, sometimes even in the hard way, some important lessons of life. Recently I read an article on The Guardian which stated the top five regrets of the dying people. They were not very surprising and are ones most people have at later stages in their life. They were:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

The first one is a regret a lot of people have – living a life they wanted and not something everyone else expected. From the very beginning we are taught that family and society is very important. We are taught to behave and act in a certain manner else we are mocked by the society. Sometimes family and societal pressure forces us to make decisions or choices in career or life that we don’t want to make but have to because that is what is accepted in society. And that is the biggest mistake we make. I agree that family is really important and society is too till some extent, but they should never become more important or bigger than your dreams (or so I believe).

Sometimes parents don’t understand or support our decisions. They think what we are doing is wrong, and that something else might be better for us. At times, they may be right but there are situations and conditions where they are wrong. They are parents so I understand that they will always choose what is best for us, but sometimes, just sometimes, that might not be the choice that makes us happy. You need to gather up courage to go talk to them and explain them your point of view and make them understand that you happiness lies elsewhere. Your life is not “DDLJ” that like Amrish Puri your mom or dad will agree on the train platform and let you go with Shahrukh Khan. But time heals everything. It might take a month, a year or several years but one day they’ll see your point of view and forgive you if you went against them, because eventually, you are their children.

I am not saying to fight with your parents for petty stuff and small issues, because you have to start adjusting as well. But when it’s a life changing decision – about your career, or your love, or something that huge, that is when you have got to take a stand on what you believe in. It’s better to fight and make up with your parents in a month or a year rather than do according to their wish and have regrets for the rest of your life. They’ll always come around, because your happiness is their happiness. And that is how regret number 5 is linked to this one. If you don’t live a life true to yourself, you won’t be happy. And if you are not happy, what’s the point of everything else?

The purpose of this post is not to tell about my regrets or about the importance or significance of them in one’s life. It’s to make you realize that when one day when you grow old you will regret not spending more time with friends and family, for taking vacations, and for enjoying and having fun when you had the time. And with realization comes effort to change that and this is exactly the aim behind this post. Make choices that will keep you happy. Choose friends and family over work once in a while. Go out with friends, explore new places, do anything random and crazy and enjoy the moment. Keep laughing as your smile might make someone else happy too. Don’t make choices which you think will make you regret later on in life. As always, it’s easier said than done. That is true, but it is your life and you have got only one lifetime to live it. Make it full of love, laughter and cherished memories rather than having a bunch of regrets and sulking on and on about it. In the end I’d just like to say, go live your life, be it in any way you can and with whatever you have. Make the most out of it.

GO.CREATE.SOME.MEMORIES.TODAY!!!

Source: http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/01/top-five-regrets-of-the-dying